Adventures in MT lab

I did mention about our MT physics I/C,right?..Nw,comes our MT chemistry...chem I/C,exactly opposite 2 dat of phy I/C...nd I/C means Instructor Incharge...Truly,v still dnt knw his name!!He s a man of about 45-50 year old or atleast he looks so with very little traces of hair on his scalp nd always in a mood 2 scold nd harass students wid his never ending Q's.Only 2 things r most fav 2 him, 1.Asking viva., 2.Deducting marks of a student..hopeless!! :( :'( As dey say every coin has two sides, he also has a comedy side in him or atleast comedy 2 us...His English!!Sometyms v rofl at his english..here s a sample 4 u..
#Keep looking the notice board#
#I'll tell u on notice board where to come, U come and meet me in my office#
#After completing the experiment,meet all three of U#
Coming to the main part,it was our second chem lab nd v hd 2 do this stupid detection processes.Those endless processes where v have 2 detect d presence of Glucose, Fructose nd even some acids nd whatnot everything!!Let us call our I/C Mr.Chem 4 instance.Nd if u remember, Me,Su n B.t. r in d same sec...as usual, v did our nightout d day b4 n got up late, ofcourse nt as late as mentioned earlier nd reched d lab late only by 5 min.And there he was,standing at d entrance as d Hell Master himself nd said,"M nt goin 2 allow u in."
"What shit!!V were only late by 5 min!!Come on,5 min s nothing!!" This s wat v wanted 2 say bt lookin at his Hell boy face,v couldnt open our mouth.While all our minds were workin fast on d fake reason to b told nw, Su's brain suggested smthn nd v used d idea,so  opened our mouths,
Su : "Sir,v were late in a class."
Mr.Chem : "What class??"
B.t : "Maths"
Mr.Chem : "Who's class?? What s d sec num n instructors name??"
All : *Shit*
Me in mind : *What a kind of Q s dis?!!Who will ask such Q??I mean, WHO WILL ASK SUCH Q?!!!!!*
Mr Chem : "Come on.tell me!!"
Me : blank
Su : blank
B.t. : "Sir,v dnt knw!!" *trembling*
Mr.Chem : "Dnt knw?!!!What do u mean dnt knw!!Hw can u nt knw d name of ur Instructor?!!!U hav 2 tell me d name n sec num,only den i'll let u in!!"
Saying this he went away
B.t : "Y s he so excited??V even dnt knw his name!!"
((4 d excitement he showed here,I thot if v said v dnt knw his name either, he would hav got an heart atack!!))
As God was on our side,Su brought d time table book which has d details of all classes.It s given 2 us on d day b4 registration,its like a "Guidance Book". Bt registration itself s one useless n hopeless process nd as if v need guidance 2 do a hopeless job!! That useless binding of papers seemed like The Holy Bible dat day... never in my life I thot dat book will b helpful 2 us.Thanking God, v searched 4 a sec num which s on dat particular tym n got one.Its sec num 6 nd Instructor was Mr.ABC (say).Proud as v were 4 finding what v want,v showed Sir d sec num n I/C's name.
Mr.Chem : "R u sure??"
All : "Yeah!!"
Mr.Chem : "K den,I'll conform dis wid Mr.ABC.If u r telling a lie I'll nt give u marks 4 dis experiment n will take serious actions towards u!!"
That was it,that was d moment where v felt as if d world ended 4 us!!V have never attended d class, v even dnt knw hw Mr.ABC looks like!!!And Mr.ABC wouldnt hav even heard of our names!!On d top of all dese, in case of arrogance n sadism, Mr.ABC s like twin brother of Mr.Chem!!!Having nthn 2 do wid d circumstances,v have decided atleast 2 do d exp well.Nd v started our exp...he came even there...
Mr.Chem : "Which exp do u have today?"
Su : "Detection of Organic Compounds"
Mr.Chem : "Where s ur lab coat?"
All of us : !!!!!!!
((V turned around n looked at d whole class,not even a single student was wearing a lab coat!!))
Mr.Chem : "Dnt U knw U have to get ur lab coats!!K,next tym bring ur lab coats.Nd, in dis exp u shud nt keep d test tube slant while heating. tell me y?"
And he pointed towards me!!
Wat d ****!! I came 2 knw dat v shud nt keep d test tube slant only when he told me, nw hw come will i knw d reason 4 it nw!!Trying 2 say something I started answering wid full confidence..
Me : "Sir,coz d chemicals r very reactive n may gush on 2 ur face nd...."
Mr.Chem : "Ur head!!!"
Me : !!!!!!
B.t. : !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Su : "hehe!!!.... Oh Sorry!!" *still laughing*
Did he just say 'Ur head'?? Ur head??!!!!!
Then he pointed 2wards B.t. Being afrid of what he might scold her, she simply said, "Dnt knw Sir". He turned 2 Su nd asked d same Q,
Su : "Sir,d test tube may break nd..."
Listenin 2 our ans, may b he thought v r hopeless,said some reason n went away. From then his name s Mr.Ur head!!
As if this was not enough,another day came, wid another adventure, for us to b done.Dat day v had 2 do some 'Iodination' exp..I dnt remember what it s about.As usual,v went 2 d lab nd started our exp...B4 telling abt wat happend in d lab,remember dat me, Su, B.t, V, Ash r all in an assoc ((Bitsian term 4 association));lets say X assoc among all d assocs,clubs,departments v have in BITS, more 2 b told abt our "beloved" assoc in coming posts...so,as v were doin our exp, our sr started calling us.First Su got d call then B.t n then me,v ignored it 4 sm tym bt he kept on calling as it was a life n death matter,so, v took out our phone n started texting him wat d matter was,nd totally forgot abt d exp.V came into d present world when sm1 shouted frm behind, "What r u doing??". V,half irritated n half conscious turned around 2 see who it was.  Nd huh!!It was none other than d Hell Master, Mr.Ur head. Shocked by d sight infront of us, v noticed dat d tym left s only half an hour, v have to take totally 5 readings of d exp nd v have taken only 1!!
Mr.Chem : "Only half an hour s left n u have taken only 1 reading!!!When will u complete d whole exp?!!"
Saying dat he went away...nd v continued wid our exp, dunno wats d prob wid our exp, may b its d apparatus or our ignorance of d exp or our bad luck, wat ever d case s, our values were abrupt...only 10 mins were left..so v started thinkin...its ob v r nt goin to complete d whole exp in 15 min, so v borrowed d lab book of guys who have already done d exp n copied d result.Declaring dat v hav completed d exp,v showed Sir our results..
Mr.Ur head : "Before 30 min u had only 1 reading nd now u have all the readings?!!!U copied dint u??"
Nw wat do u expect of ny1 hw to react in a situation like this??!!!V were dumbfolded bt soon regained our senses nd were successful in convincing dat v have done d exp.
Another day,me n B.t wrote d Chem practical record 2gether nd submitted it 2 him....
Mr.Ur head : "How come U both wrote d same things in Ur record??U copied, dint U??"
#Yeah,in BITS, unlike all other colleges,U should nt copy a lab record bt write it in ur own words!!#
B.t. : "No Sir,its just dat v both wrote it 2gether."
Mr.Ur head : "Bt it should nt b similar,next tym make sure dat u dnt write d same, der must b difference atleast in grammar!!"
Nw hw s 'grammar' goin 2 matter in a 'chemistry' record, I dnt knw!!!Thus our MT Chem was a disaster!!!